If you haven’t binged Netflix’s Love is Blind in its entirety, you should stop reading now, because there is nothing but spoilers ahead!
I randomly decided to watch Love is Blind the day it debuted, while absentmindedly scrolling through my Netflix queue looking for something entirely different to watch (I’m more true crime than reality-tv romance). But, I watched The Circle about a month or so earlier, and Netflix strongly recommended I give this show a shot. OK, sure.
An hour later, I was stage whispering at my television while watching Lauren and Cameron declare their love for each other at the end of the first (!) episode. “No you don’t!” I protested under my breath upon Lauren’s insistence that she knew this man well enough to consider committing to him for life. It was, after all, only her third day speaking to him.
Love is Blind’s premise is simple. A group of single men and women speak to each other through walls in isolated “pods” with the goal of falling in love with someone without ever meeting them face to face. And after love is declared and tears are shed, the couples get to meet, go on a vacation, meet each other’s friends and families, and then walk down the aisle and seal the deal.
I love Married at First Sight, which is even more high-risk than Love is Blind, considering the Married at First Sight couples have no idea who will be at the end of the aisle. Even so, the conviction of the Love is Blind cast was jarring at first.
On day 3, Kelly says that she has already spoken to three men who she would be willing to spend the rest of her life with. Three! (What are they talking about in these pods?!)
Eventually the group is whittled down to six couples: Lauren and Cameron (everyone’s favorite, amiright?), Kelly and Kenny, Giannina and Damian, Amber and Barnett, Jessica (Messica) and Mark, and Diamond and Carlton. As I watched these couples for hours at a time, staying up way past my bedtime, I tried to figure out what was it about this show that has me so hooked? And I think I cracked the mystery.
Netflix hit it out of the park with casting. We’ve all dealt with at least one personality type in each couple. I know what you’re thinking, and yes, even Mark and Messica.
Lauren and Cameron
The relatable one in this duo is Lauren. She’s funny, awkward at times, and completely overwhelmed by how honest, sincere, and earnest Cameron is. Even though that’s exactly what she was looking for, she shared several times that she’s never actually been with a man that possessed all of those qualities. And she found it in a pod! She summed it up perfectly at her bachelorette party when she said she’s been praying for a man like this, Jesus sent her one, and now she’s scared to death. But she said “I do” and the couple is still together. Won’t He do it?
Kelly and Kenny
We’ve all dealt with a Kelly. Someone who smiles in your face, says all the right things, plays the role they’re supposed to play, and then one day completely blindsides you for unknown reasons. Poor Kenny was all dressed up for the best day of his life, only to have Kelly do the A-town stomp all over his heart. And for what? The whole season she gushed about how great things are with Kenny, waiting to reveal that actually no, he gives her friend vibes the day before the wedding. Her friends, bless them, try to talk some sense into her via the “you have a bad picker” talk, to no avail.
Giannina and Damian
If you haven’t worked with a Giannina at some point in your career, consider yourself lucky. But I think a lot of us have had that dramatic coworker that is clearly the star of the movie in their head and has pre-planned one liners and zingers to say for the meeting way ahead of time. When I was fresh out of college, an old boss would give these dramatic “off the cuff” remarks to the office that were clearly memorized speeches and listening to them was awkward for everyone. Giannina definitely gave me those vibes when she delivered her zinger to Damian about his… uh, performance and her lack of praise. How long were you sitting on that one, Gigi?
Amber and Barnett
Listen, I don’t get all the hostility toward Barnett. Sure, he was dealing with three women at the same time and was trying to make a decision but give the guy a break! He had to pick a fiancé in what, five days? I think a lot of us would have a difficult time doing that if we had lots of options. But once he picked Amber, he never wavered. Even with Jessica’s constant asides with him about their “connection in the pods.” He kept his distance and kept making Amber cackle-laugh with his frat boy humor.
Jessica and Mark
You know a Jessica. I know a Jessica. Your Auntie knows a Jessica. They’re everywhere. One minute they’re telling you that you’re their soul mate and the next, they’re telling producers how much they don’t like you. Hot and cold, up and down, everything is totally unpredictable. Sounds a lot like our president, tbh. Good ‘ol Mark stuck around for the wedding and actually said that he wanted to marry her (why, Mark?) but no one was surprised when Jessica turned him down and quietly walked out of the venue. Mark was left heartbroken at the altar. Cut to Jessica telling the camera “I’ll apologize if I need to, but I’m actually not sorry.” We know Messica, we know.
Carlton and Diamond
Whew, Carlton and Diamond went through a lot together. I agree with Diamond that Carlton should have told her about his sexuality before getting engaged, but in Carlton’s defense, this is not a regular dating process and it seems like there is clearly some trauma there for him that made it uncomfortable for him to disclose that to her. In this couple, I think Diamond is the relatable one, simply because we’ve all quoted Beyoncé lyrics to get through tough times, have we not? Who run the world?
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